To recognize that something is wrong with your mind it is very difficult. And it is even harder not to be afraid to tell the whole world about it. That was what made Lauren Stott, who gave an interview to a news portal about itself and about the personalities living in his head. It seems impossible to imagine how to live with them, but it is extremely interesting to find out.
Great.guru was impressed with his story because, sometimes, it is not very easy to get along with itself, and it must coexist with 12 different parts of his “I”. We propose to take a look at the soul of this amazing young man together with us.
“Hi, I’m Lauren, I’m 23 years old, I live in the united States. And also I’m Sylvie, I have 7 years. And also Hope, of 17. And also I’m up to a mormon devotee. ’How so?’ you may ask. It is simple: in 2016, I tried to commit suicide, and it was discovered that I have 12 different personalities inside of me. Not bad, huh? Understand that you are on the edge of a bridge or with a bottle of pills in hand, and that someone inside of you wants you to die.
I suffer from a dissociative identity disorder (TID), which causes a person to live the life of several different people at the same time. And not necessarily of the same sex, race or religion. This disease is many times confused with schizophrenia, but there is little in common between them. In schizophrenia, people perceive the world in a distorted way and are based on hallucinations and misconceptions. I see the world as it is, but through the perception of 12 completely different people. They take turns in my head, and sometimes I can’t even remember what each of them did. As says dr. David Spiegel, vice chairman of the Department of Psychiatry of the University of Stanford, my problem is the integration of the memories and the sense of self-identity.
I found out about my illness recently, in 2017, when one of my personalities wanted to commit suicide. The doctors discovered that, when I was in second grade, something caused me a great emotion and my personality is divided. It is a kind of protective reaction of the psyche. Now, every day I go to a special therapy, where physicians communicate with each one of my personalities. Are looking closer to them to take away fragments of memories and as well collect the complete picture of my life past and present.
I call the personalities in my head to “system” and not know them all by name. For example, I have a character intellectual: a mormon devotee. Even I was baptized when his personality was the main, but I remember it very vaguely. The character Hope, protect me from the painful memories of adolescence. It was she who recalled that, at the age of 17 years, I suffered abuse, know that meant a great breakthrough for my therapy. The more you communicate with the therapist is Sylvie, a girl of 7 years, but it is very capricious, coy, and wants to hear it all the time. It is difficult and unpleasant for me to talk about my other personalities, some are even animals.
To gather together and retain the memories of each one, I take 12 a day. All of these personalities in my head are part of me, I am fragmented into 12 psyches different. During the therapy, I imagine that they are all sitting in the same classroom, and I watch from above, as if it were the master.
Because of the movies and series, people with this type of disorders are considered to be dangerous and cruel. Remember yourself: usually, they are killers cunning or thieves. To me this complicates life, but the worst thing is when people don’t believe me and says that only the invention of all. In those moments, I think: “Who could invent something like that? And, most importantly, what for?”.
Thanks to the special therapy and medication, I’m getting better. But my main emotional support, and my urge to get over is my dog, Sergeant Tibbs. Is always there when I experience memories of a difficult and panic attacks. In those moments, lying down on me, and sometimes even opens the fridge, takes out a bag of ice and I the brings.
My story shows that life is something complicated, but that there is always someone that can reach out a hand. So, for example, my boyfriend and I are planning our wedding for next year. Sometimes, my boyfriend says that our quotations are as dating with a girl. In those moments, my personality is guided by Sylvie, who will gun small scandals. But, despite of everything rare that I am, he loves me, and understands me. I have a lot of hope that the day comes that you no longer need to go to therapy. There are still many things to discover in my head, but I think that sooner or later, everything will be as it should be.”
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