With the beginning of a new year always get the urge to start a new life. We make plans and wish lists, we are determined and inflexible. But every time something goes wrong, another year flies by in the middle of the endless routine, and we never get closer to the goal. In the end, instead of joy, we feel frustration and helplessness.
Why is it so? Great.guru has selected some of the mistakes that we all make at the beginning of a new year, when we try to change our lives.
Not be sufficiently honest with ourselves to the time to make a list of wishes
Make a list of wishes. And now tick all the “wants” that are not yours. Just be honest to yourself. Discard what is imposed by the fashion, loved ones and friends. Realize what you need and then really you will be motivated to work to fulfill the wishes of the list.
We want everything to be perfect. Or that is not in any way
The excess of perfectionism takes away many forces and energies. We want an ideal, but subconsciously we understand that we are not going to achieve it and, as a result, not even trying to do something. We hope the time is right, we hope to have the energy, we hope to have the time. In psychology, there is the notion of “paralysis of the perfectionist”. It is used for people who have the inner conviction that it is not possible to do something in an ideal form, and therefore are afraid to start out. Don’t be so strict with yourself. Allow yourself to make mistakes along the way towards your dream. Otherwise, you run the risk of not moving never in the same place.
We propose a goal that is too big, but we don’t think in the intermediate stages to reach it
If a large task is divided into several small steps and gradual, it will much easier to perform. For example, you want to lose weight 12 pounds in a year. Download the 12 together is difficult, but if fraccionas the goal to lose one kilogram per month, will be a target very realistic. Learn a language, acquire new skills, save up for a trip: any target that is difficult to split into stages will be much more feasible. The subconscious ceases to fear the volume. In addition, so you can control your progress toward the goal.
We cling to the past
In reality, all fear of the future. Because no one knows what is there. While in the past we know everything. Yes, it is not so good, but it is relatively safe. To build new plans, unconsciously we fear to stray too much from what is already known and we don’t dream big. The fear of losing what we have now eclipses the prospects of the future, alternatives to busy roads. But the possibilities are much broader.
We want to start a new life of blow
We want everything, we want it now and don’t want to wait. We want the changes to arrive dramatically, on the same day of the New Year. And then, when nothing happens, we are distressed. But nothing happens from one day to the other. The important thing is to not stop moving forward towards the goal every day, little by little, even if at first you do not see any change. Because if you get angry and stop the movement, there will be no change. But if you keep moving forward in small steps, a year later, doing the balance, you’ll be proud of yourself.
We criticize them for failed attempts and we give up
Don’t torture by “another failed attempt”. That won’t help. You will only make you feel helpless and tired, you will get off your hands and all the previous attempts will have been in vain. Don’t do that. Look at the situation realistically, learn how to see also the good. Date encouragement and support to yourself. Date time if necessary. Give yourself a chance.
We began to defer, what to do
Everything is clearly planned and firmly decided. But we will start the diet when you in the refrigerator for an end to the cakes and learn something new when we have rested a little, because after the hustle and bustle of New Year there is rest, right? And so on. Start a new life with the New Year is comfortable, because it seems that there is no where to postpone things. But our unconscious will always find a justification for the laziness and lack of will to change that out.
We do not encourage enough
Perhaps in the depths of your being you are not certain that this is exactly what will make you happy. The unconscious holds on to the sofa fluffy and your idea of jogging in the morning with this cold doesn’t seem as good. If the motivation is insufficient, even the enthusiasm plus strong will last a short time. Visualize your dream. He paints with colors the advantages of its realization. Motivate yourself in such a way that the phrase “after all, neither wanted to both” can’t be an excuse.
We talk too much about our plans
We set a new goal, we inform our friends and colleagues and even
we make statements in social networks. And we are quiet inside, believing that we have already done half the work. But in general, the intentions on which we so passionately speaks for people not to make it a reality. Psychologists believe that this has to do with self-identification. All they want to appear successful. And the intention, the determination, and the approval of others makes a person feel successful. Paradoxically, this feeling reduces the opportunities for self-improvement and working on oneself. The subconscious mind is born the idea that everything is already good, then what do you do something? So, less words, more action!!! And it will all work out wonderfully.
We lack the courage to recognize all the problems
We close our eyes to many things and we don’t recognize some of our weaknesses. As a result, don’t think of when developing our list of wishes and goals. That’s why our beautiful dreams are broken against the hard reality. Be honest to yourself, accept your imperfections, and plan the changes in your life based on what you have.
Иллюстратор Sergey Raskovalov for Great.guru
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